“I will survive.” — your iPhone, probably.

smartphone_addiction

This picture makes me sad.  So incredibly sad.

This weekend was my fifth wedding anniversary.  My husband and I had planned an evening out, which entailed a dinner at a restaurant we wouldn’t normally go to and our son being at my aunt’s for the night.  I had been looking forward to this night for a long time; my husband works six days a week and it’s rare that we go out like this when he doesn’t have to go to work the next day.  When we had a child-free night, we really meant that we had one.  Our son was not a topic of conversation, most parents fall into that trap easily.  Don’t get me wrong, my little man is amazing and wonderful and I love him so much…but I can’t talk about him constantly, not even with my husband.  We talked about a plethora of things – we joked around, we laughed a lot, we held hands, we shared our food.  My husband joked about the chandelier and how it would look perfect in our bedroom (note – this chandelier was probably bigger than my entire bedroom and living room combined).  We truly enjoyed each other’s company.

As I was looking around at the decor of the restaurant, I couldn’t help but notice a couple two tables over from us.  The girl could not give her man the time of day, whatever was on her phone had to be much more exciting than the guy she was with.  I looked back at my husband and said, ‘Thank goodness that isn’t us.’  We have a rule when we’re out to dinner, our phones stay out of sight.  I also do this with my best friend, when she and I are out to dinner…we talk to each other, what’s on our phones is the least of our concern and worry.  We truly enjoy each other’s company.  Why don’t people enjoy each other’s company anymore?  Why are people so caught up in what’s on their phones rather than what’s right there in front of them?

During our night out, my phone came out to take some pictures (not of our meal).  I didn’t post the vast majority of them to social media until the next day.  I don’t feel the imminent need to post up something to Instagram, Twitter or Facebook as it happens.  I like to enjoy the moments that I spend with people instead of hurry and rush to come up with a clever caption and hashtag to go with it.  Only one was posted up, and I kinda felt like a jerk for doing so…because it could wait.  When was the last time you truly enjoyed time with people where you didn’t have the need to reach for your phone – whether it be to check email, texts or social media and to post whatever picture you just took?  My husband knows it’s bothers me, in fact it really burns me up.  There was a group of four people at the table next to us that could not stop reading Facebook…to each other.  I know what Michelle did at her bridal shower, guys.  I don’t know her, but I know she got a special recipe book from her cousin.

Someone please help me out on this – what is the fascination of this?  Are you afraid you’re going to miss something?  Let’s face it, there are a lot of us that lived in a time without cell phones.  In high school, texting was in the form of a handwritten note passed between class periods.  If we needed to call someone and we were out, we used a payphone.  If we were out with friends, we were talking to each other.  To me, there is nothing quite like spending time with people you care for and actually SPENDING time with them.  Giving them your attention, engaging with one another.  Now give yourself a project, give yourself a test.  Next time you’re out, keep your phone in your purse/pocket…see how long you can go without taking it out to check something.  It’s okay to disconnect, it’s okay to miss statuses, posts and tweets.  I don’t know when it became not okay to do, but it’s one of those things that truly bothers me about living in a digital world.

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I cannot cut out carbs.

Every four months, I have to get my blood taken and then a follow up at the endocrinologist.  This has been the way it’s gone since pregnancy – when I was first diagnosed with hypothyroidism.  Did I have it before then?  I don’t know, it’s possible.  I never went and got blood tests that I should have, and I didn’t take care of myself as well.  I didn’t have a young life depending on me then.  When I was diagnosed, the doctor told me that I’d have to take a pill for the rest of my life.  After I had my son, I didn’t go back for another check up or blood test – the day I was supposed to go in was the day that I gave birth.  I didn’t keep up with my medication as well as I should have, and then suddenly I started feeling like death was creeping up on me.

I made the appointment and went for a blood test.  I’ve seen many doctors in my lifetime, but this one just looked at me and asked if I truly care about myself enough to keep healthy.  It hit me hard because here I am, mid thirties with a child – being told that I need to get my crap together or else.  And then I just became a lunatic about making sure I took my medication first thing in the morning.  Four months later, I’m being told my thyroid is still not where it should be.  I voiced my concerns about my weight, about how I have changed my diet and I’m not seeing results.  That has everything to do with having hypothyroidism.  It takes me more time and a lot of hard work to lose weight more than it would your average person who doesn’t have such an issue.

I started this year trying to do better with what I eat, and I think I’m doing okay.  I started to obsess over numbers instead of realizing that it’s a difficult journey for me because of my thyroid and the obstacles I’m going to face.  When I asked my doctor what I can do differently, he told me to avoid carbs.  I laughed, and said…”I can’t cut them out of my diet.  Cut down, but not cut out.”  I’m Italian, I love pasta and bread.  I love rice, I love potatoes.  You can’t take that away from me, thyroid.

Over the past 24 hours I’ve gone on Pinterest and made a board, I’ve read articles, I’ve read diet suggestions.  I’ve seen a list of foods to avoid, foods that you should eat more of.  I’m fighting the urge to run to Barnes & Noble for a book that I found that they have in stock.  I want to live a healthy life for myself, for my husband and son.  I know that I am never going to be cured for this, but I can at least get it all under control.  It’s going to take a lot of hard work and dedication, but I have to start somewhere.  Just don’t tell my doctor that I’m having pizza for lunch.

If anyone reading this has tips to share on what works for them, please do…I welcome it.